On Friday of last week, I took Little Man to the mini museum in a town close to our home. I posted this picture to remind me of his reaction to the first building we went into: “Mommy, I don’t like it here. It’s too dark and it smells funny. Let’s get out of here!”
Textbook Sensory Processing Disorder! It’s a good thing there were a lot of activities going on outside, otherwise it would have been a wasted trip. I’m learning more and more to let Little Man lead (without letting him always control, if there can be a difference) our excursions. It ends in much happier days for us all. Instead of bending over backwards trying to figure out what might make him happy and what might set him off, I am trying to just let things happen and listen to whatever cues he might give me. The listening bit is tough for a controlling freak like me.
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Tomorrow will be our second appointment with the OT. I want to ask her some questions about Little Man’s therapy plan.
First, I’d like to know why she’s insisting on him doing puzzles from the outside in. Ever since our last appointment (where she first introduced the strict idea of doing the corners first, then the rest of the edges, then the middle), he’s been avoiding his puzzles. This bothers me a bit because he’s always loved puzzles. Since before he was two. To see him avoiding one of his favourite past-times, because of a therapy that is supposed to help him, really bothers me. I don’t want this to sound awfully stern and problematic, because it could just be a coincidence that he doesn’t feel like doing puzzles, but I think I’ll feel better with an explanation as to why the OT thinks it’s so important that he learn to do puzzles this way. I know kids need to learn that sometimes there is a “good” method to a task and sometimes there is a “better” method, but his method was working just fine for him, so why mess with it? We’ll see what she says. I want to try to ask it in a non-confrontational way, so as to look concerned and involved moreso than meddling and bitchy. Know what I mean?
Those of you who’ve had children go through OT, have you experienced anything similar to this? Any answers for me?
Second, I’d like to just approach the topic of Asperger’s Syndrome with her. I know that the child psychiatrist ruled it out (after only the first appointment, mind you), but a couple of people have mentioned the possibility to me lately. I truly (I think?) believe that he doesn’t have AS, due to his communication abilities and his ability to converse and read facial expressions, but other than that, he does exhibit a lot of the symptoms of AS. Again, I doubt (highly) that it is AS, but now that others have mentioned it again, I feel the need for more reassurance. Mind you, what would be a less daunting diagnosis: OCD or AS? It’s kind of a roll of the dice, no?
So those will be my questions tomorrow. I think there might be more, but that’s all that comes to mind tonight.
Kia
Okay, I have officially added you to my reader so I don’t forget to come check.
You should definitely ask her why she’s insisting on the puzzles being done from the outside in? I would just be straightforward about it – “I’m curious, why do you insist that he do the puzzles from the outside in? What’s the benefit to that?” Simple enough.
My DD’s OT uses “child led therapy” where she follows Chee’s interests and then uses what Chee is interested in to accomplish something therapeutic. Over time, however, (we’ve been at this a year already) she evolved it to where first it’s Chee’s choice, then it’s Therapist’s choice. This gives her the opportunity to push her to do something she might be uncomfortable with and naturally avoid. She didn’t start that till after she and Chee has formed a pretty solid bond.
While SPD is kind of complicated, it’s not *that* complicated so if something doesn’t make sense to YOU, the MOM, you should definitely question it. Especially these first few months. You’re the expert on Little Man, and the therapist is just getting to know him. I’m at the point now where I don’t go back there anymore because I get what’s going on and I just get the summary at the end.
Good luck and look forward to hearing how it went!
By: Good Fountain on July 14, 2008
at 9:02 pm
Oh, thanks so much for the input! It helps that there are others, like you, who have been through this as well. Most people that I know irl look at me like I have 6 eyes when I say “SPD.”
Interesting that your OT goes back and forth between your daughter choosing the activity, then the OT choosing the activity. Ours did that last week, too. Must be a proven method!
I’m definitely going to be asking about the puzzles tomorrow. For all I know, it was as simple as trying to figure out if Little Man could follow directions or not. I still want to know, though.
Again, thanks so much for your input. It means a lot!
By: goodmum on July 14, 2008
at 9:07 pm
Most OTs are actually assholes . TTheir in tentions are good, but they say the shittiest stuff and make you do pointless exercises. That being said, sometimes they come up with something spot on. Your situation is difficult for sure. . Is Little Man able to express and receive affection?
By: Nadine/Scarb on July 14, 2008
at 10:11 pm
He can express/receive affection on his terms. Unexpected or unwanted hugs, touches are not ok with him…
By: goodmum on July 14, 2008
at 10:14 pm
First, I’m laughing at the puzzle thing, because THIS IS HOW I DO IT. Outside in. Edges first. It’s like a big huge family rule – we do huge puzzles during holiday visits. It just cracked me up that you posted about it. I’ve found myself talking about how you build a puzzle with C – not because I insist he does it my way, but to make some sense of them for him. To give him a pattern to go by. Otherwise he gets frustrated with them because they become overwhelming. But lately he’s just gotten better at the visual part so the need for the “rules” arent’ as strong. I can’t imagine why your OT would insist on doing it that way if Little Man has success with them on his own terms. I like Good Fountain’s suggestion on how to ask the OT. Let us know the answer you get!
Regarding the AS (or not) diagnosis, I guess I’d say you might want to see another doc. You can go to 12 different docs and get 12 different diagnoses, you know? But that being said, the SPD, AS and OCD go hand in hand and differentiating between them might be almost impossible at this point. Personally, if I had to choose, I’d pick AS over OCD any day. OCD can be really destructive to one’s life. Not that AS isn’t a struggle at times. I guess ultimately you’ll have to take a lesson from your own post and go with the cues he gives you and work on what needs to be worked on.
Okay, going to add you to my blogroll now. I’ve been remiss and busy!
By: asdmommy on July 15, 2008
at 2:47 pm
Yeah, I think I’d pick AS over OCD, too. But OCD IS hereditary and Hubby has it quite severely. He owns his own business with his dad, otherwise working a “real” job might be out of the question…we’ll see. The more I know about AS, the more I think LM doesn’t have it. Oh, and you’re totally right: 12 docs would probably equal 12 diagnoses.
By: goodmum on July 15, 2008
at 4:13 pm
I don’t get the puzzle thing either. Who cares how he does them?
By: deb on July 15, 2008
at 10:20 pm